Painfully Polite

Being polite hurt my knees and made me lose my favorite seat.  Now, I’m sitting in the horrible perpendicular seat (P-seat) and this girl in front of me has been unwrapping this piece of candy for five damn minutes!  I feel like snatching it and throwing it at the other end of the train.😠  My knees are pressed in the tight space against the P-seat and I feel like I need to be wearing an age tag. Needless to say, I’m not a happy camper on this dreary day.

It all started with me being polite and standing back to let this older lady (no age tag needed) enter the train first.  I guess she was so used to folks rushing past her, she hesitated.  Once she boarded, she could not make up her mind on which seat she wanted…all while the seats were filling up from the other doors.  When she finally decided, it was the last good seat – MY SEAT.😩😩😩  I managed to keep a pleasant smile on my face…at least I hope it was.  It possibly was more deranged than I imagined though because deep down, I was mad at her.  lol

I was too engrossed in Facebook to notice when I got a new seat mate.  He was rather thin, so no hip rubbing took place.  He was quiet and still the entire ride.  My only qualm was he took too long to get up after I said excuse me to beat folks to the door.  That allowed at least 7 people get in front of me which made me get caught up in heavy stairs traffic.😡  I almost didn’t make it on the shuttle.  SEAT MATE GRADE: C (it was an A before he set me back)

So now I’m sitting on the shuttle next to a youngin smelling hella “loud”.  I don’t know much about dem tweeds, but his smells way worse than the girl’s did a few weeks ago.  I’m actually feeling sick to my stomach.  Didn’t he know he was going to work today?!!!  Walking in there smelling skunked out can’t be good for his career.  Last I checked, it wasn’t legal here.  Perhaps, it’s the only way he can deal with the people at his job.  But, if they are trying to figure out a reason to get rid of him, he is walking in with one today.  Someone really needs to make weed that smells like cologne for these folks who just can’t help themselves before work.  Hmmmmm👀👀👀


In the Weeds

This is an interesting one for me.  My seat mate (I’m going to call her Mary Jane) smells like she showered in dro, got out to put on her kush lotion, and then followed that with ganja eau de toilette.  I hope she is not on her way to work.  If so, she may be walking into a random drug test.  Shit, I might be walking into one just from sitting next to her.  She’s in this for the long haul – got on 2 stops after me and didn’t depart at the transfer point.  What if she forgot to get off?😳  I think I’m getting a contact…I’m hella hungry.  But then again, I have yet to eat breakfast. 😜  I wonder if that’s what she had for breakfast.  I wonder if my head bobbing is blowing her.  Blame it on my playlist.🤷🏽‍♀️ I’m almost at the end of my 40 minute ride and she’s still hanging in there.  We are “bud”dies now.  Get it, get it!  I’m so punny. 😂. Time for me to go. She’s been a pretty decent seatmate – no cheetos nor funyuns dust, no epiphanies, good spacing, elbow low…straight chillin.  SEAT MATE GRADE: B